Not too long ago I went to my family doctor for a yearly physical wellness exam. A very friendly nurse measured me, weighed me, and took my temperature. She also asked me the regular series of questions for women, such as, “When was your last menstrual period,” and “Is there any chance that you are pregnant?” To the latter question, I answered no. At that point I was a 21-year-old college student who, by God’s grace, was saving my virginity for marriage, trying to live a chaste life, and feeling very strongly about my convictions in this area. The nurse proceeded to ask me, at this point seemingly deviating from the questions on the form, if I was on any kind of birth control. (more…)
Chastity is a virtue that each baptized person is called to live no matter what his or her vocation. Chastity is more about what you are doing than about what you aren’t doing. It is SO MUCH MORE than merely abstaining from sex and remaining a “technical virgin.” Chastity is actually at the heart of a good marriage. So if chastity is lived even after marriage, then it has to be more than just saying NO to sex.
Chastity defined: Chastity is a virtue that directs all our sexual desires, emotions, and attractions toward the dignity of the person and the real meaning of love.
That means that all of our sexual desires, emotions, and attractions to others are supposed to be at the service of the dignity of the other person and the real meaning of love—not at the service of what we want! Chastity is a deep respect and admiration for the person AND for the gifts of our sexuality and sex. As John Paul II puts it, chastity is the readiness to affirm and love the person in every situation. You know what you are saying no to by living chastity, but what are you saying YES to? (more…)
1. Dress in a way appropriate to your dignity. As Crystalina Evert, an awesome chastity speaker puts it, “Don’t walk around sending the message that your body is the best part of you—implying that your heart, mind, and soul aren’t so important. Instead, say with your modesty, ‘I’m worth waiting to see.’”
2. Refuse to sleep with a man until you have his wedding ring on your finger. IF HE REALLY LOVES YOU, he’ll wait. This respect—both the respect you will have for yourself and the respect the man will have for you—will carry over to your marriage someday. (more…)